Monthly Archives: May 2007

Child Pornography, Etc…


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Date: May 28, 2007

Child pornography is not a bad thing, in itself…

…but, one might wonder, why I avoid viewing, trading and keeping this type of material.

I suppose, I could best explain this with the example of a mouse and cheese.

By itself, finding a hunk of cheese, is a very good thing, for a mouse. It makes the mouse happy…it sustains the mouse.

…However…when that hunk of cheese, is being offered up, on the latch of a mouse trap…that cheese suddenly becomes deadly…

…not because the cheese itself is bad…but, because the source offering the cheese, has severe, ill intent.

Child pornography is rarely offered up commercially, from any source other than law enforcement…people like the FBI.

…Hence, I do not trade, at all…

It is incredibly difficult to find, true, child pornography online…on the web, that is…

Newsgroups, yes…sometimes, if you know where to look, you can find it…but, on the world wide web, itself…only a ridiculous amount of luck, would make any search for child pornography, successful.

You cant start, not knowing where to go…and then, suddenly be watching child porn movies, an hour later.

Whatever does end up on the web, is risky to access…IPs (your internet address) may get harvested.

It rarely stays up long…and when it is taken down, investigations commonly ensue…who put it there…who accessed it…

Peer to peer clients may be an avenue to this type of material…but, do you know who you are downloading from? People are being sued for music piracy…How hidden do you really think you are?

…You are not hidden, at all…

Truth be told…I love good, clean, natural, child pornography…I do…

…but, I will not access it, or keep it, because it is to much of a legal liability, to me…it is to much of a risk factor.

It is letting down my guard, in ways which are not acceptable.

I consider positive child pornography to be a valuable resource, and hope to see the day when it is once again legal, in the USA, and throughout the world.

…but, I personally will not stumble, for a cheap thrill…

I have to many, meaningful things to accomplish, to be derailed by this.

Some boylovers have said, that child pornography is like a drug, that makes you complacent…

…While I respect the fact that this is true for some, I can not say as this has been my, ultimate, experience…

Personally…I needed to see this side…I needed to know…

…I needed to know, if I ever had a leg to stand on, when taking up this fight…

I needed to know about the realities of child sexuality, every bit as much as I need to know about…so many other things…about myself…about man/boy love…about boys…

I need to know…in real life…if a boy would ever approach me…naturally…for this…

I believe…a boy, actually was trying to open that door to me, not so very long ago…and not knowing for sure, is a terrible burden…

No…I don’t know what would have happened, ultimately, had I let things go in that direction…but…because things did not evolve like that…I have been robbed of my personal validation…

…My ability to say, “Yes!…This has happened to me, first hand…and the boy came to me!”.

Logically, I know this sort of relationship does happen…it must…it is documented…people talk about it from memory…

But, I do not have my iron clad, memories…of gently caressing a boys naked body…and making gentle, yet passionate, love to him…

To my mind…this type of civil disobedience, is much more acceptable to be taken down for, than mere child pornography…because this type of civil disobedience, at least will make a real world difference.

It will give someone else (a boy), real life experience, regarding what a boylover truthfully is.

I still do not persue this either…as I am more obsessed with the fight, anymore…than anything else…This fight, has become that thing which fills the void left, from what society has cruely taken away.

This is why I refuse to deal in child pornography, in spite of the fact that I will fight to the death, in defending the sanctity, freedom and morality of documented expressions of childhood sexuality.

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All or Nothing…

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Date: May 28, 2007

CSA (child sex abuse) “experts”, politicians, and special interest lobby groups, are well experienced at pitting separate distinct groups (usually minorities, who often don’t have the resources to fight back) against one another…as though, the situation is all black or white.

…as though, one (or several) only exists at the absolute peril of the other (or several others)…

Not only does this tend to successfully deflect the public attention away from legitimate arguments against what these people stand for (or, everything they do in the name of what they stand for), it also dishonestly bolsters their own viewpoint, and propagates an abusive atmosphere, towards several, distinct and benign minorities.

This is a basic practice, of manufacturing the illusion of villain minorities, in order to fill the requirements of “proving”, that their ideology, and proposed practices, are “justified”.

Is there such a thing, as a “villain minority”?…perhaps…

Does this make all minorities labeled as such, actual “villains”?…no…

…but, in today’s world, does this even matter, anymore, to most people?

I remember the occasion, when this really became clear to me. It was amidst dialog with a person, who considers herself a child advocate (CA), and a CSA activist.

I mean no disrespect in pointing this out, but, it is almost amazing how many “CAs” will go to such prolonged extents, to completely avoid addressing certain issues (which they, nearly always, either deny, or pretend do not exist), when confronted by factual accounts, from people who do not fit into the “CAs” own ideology, of “how things are supposed to be”.

In fact, a lot of us human beings, out here, inflict serious cracks, into the foundation of many of these “CA/CSA” activists’ arguments…just by the mere fact that we exist, and can attest, that their ideas and intentions have holes in them…and, have directly abusive elements to them.

To this persons credit, however, after some time resisting acknowledging the inevitable truth, it was finally conceded that, yes, I had an honest and sincere point, when I brought up the fact that not all adult/minor sexual relationships are abusive in nature, nor are they all with negative consequences…Indeed, many have greatly positive effects on all participants.

It is not that the “CA/CSA” activists do not understand this (perhaps some do not, but, I believe that most do). It is that, they believe they have license to press on, at the peril of benign and good minorities, and without accountability for the harm they are causing….because, their “bottom line” intentions “outweigh” the severity of whatever damage they have caused to others.

…It’s “the greater good” theory…

“Yes, Mr. Diamond, what you say may be honest and true, and yes, these types of benign minorities likely do exist, but, the perceived well being of our defenseless, little children, make each and every one of your arguments ‘null and void’, when pitted against the better interests of our defenseless, little children”.

One of the most underhanded, and best assured, ways of gaining condemnation against anything, is psychologically pitting it against the best interests of “defenseless, little children”. When you can successfully create the perception that “defenseless, little children” are being hurt (or done injustice) by something, you have just politically crippled, whatever group, movement, thing, issue, etc, you’ve aimed this at.

The targets’ best interests, have now been effectively turned into a political, sacrificial lamb.

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The Right to Exist (Narrated)…


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Date: May 28, 2007

This selection from “In Self Defense: The Life and Times of An Atheist BoyLover…Memoirs and Ethos”, has been narrated by Rocco White. Please enjoy the listen, or read along if you like…or need to.


Pro child love sites, blogs, podcasts, boards, groups and chat rooms have every bit as much right to exist, as any other resource on the web.

…Which is to say…”none at all”…

Nobody has a “right” to exist on the internet…Not even owning your own resources, is a guarantee, that you will remain connected.

Oh, sure…If you change your message, and do “the correct, happy dance”…or, adopt and adhere to this, largely meaningless, behavioral structure, right from the beginning…then, you might be tolerated to exist…

What does this do, though?…

…aside from render the internet, useless, to some groups?…or, worse…

People need an outlet:

We must have expression…

…In spite of what anyone else may think of this type of expression…we, like everyone else, must express ourselves…

…If it does not happen in one manner…then it will happen in another…just like everyone else…

At this point…The only act of expression being sought on the internet, by people such as myself…is that of having and exercising a voice…expressing thoughts and ideas…presenting alternate viewpoints…sharing ourselves with the world…

Where is the travesty, in this?…Where is the immorality?…Where is the hate?…Where is the terror?…Where are the threats?

…or even so much as the crime in this?

There is a message theme, which runs constant amongst most of these types of blogs, web pages, etc…one which is based on understanding, tolerance and love…

What sort of foundational ethics exist, at the base of any society which is actually threatened by these things?…

Are love, tolerance and understanding, going to destroy anything, which you hold so dear?

…If so…then perhaps it is time you looked inward, and re-examined your own goals and ethics…

…because love, tolerance and understanding, only combat and destroy hate, intolerance and misunderstanding…

People need to reach out:

…They need support, from those who are like themselves…from those who, likewise, know and live the life…

To be without this, is to be alone…

…When you are alone…you are susceptible to lacking any sense of companionship, support…or even direction and a reason…

It is in this state, where we find that most “pedophiles”, living under the constant pressure, and psychological manipulation of western cultures like the USA, simply exceed their own limits, and experience psychological breakdowns.

…This is where, the “monsters”, which cultures like the USA demand us to be, are created…

…This is where the extreme minority, amongst our “minority” of “pedophiles”, comes from…The incredible few, who actually do kidnap, rape, torture, murder children…a select few, being serial killers…The ones plastered all over media, and claimed to be our ambassadors to the world…

We have the right to speak out…We have the right to let the world know, that that is not what we truthfully are, by our common nature.

To inhibit this voice of expression, is merely to enflame the cultural problem, which is already far beyond, out of control.

…It is feeding the mania…It is creating more victims, of this hysteria…

There will always be victims of something:

The fact that many are of the mind to cast blame, judgment, and throw blame for the fate of these people at “my” feet (or those of others like myself), only testifies to the short sightedness of those who attack people like myself, because of our message.

Many, many, many “pedophiles” empathize deeply with true victims…

This can not be stressed enough…

Many of us who are “pedophiles”, have also experienced first hand, the same sorts of things, which turn an individual person into a victim.

These public expressions…in no way, shape or form…are intended to insult victims, assault victims, or create new victims…

The intent, in fact, is the very opposite…

Victims of sexual violation, are both victims of the aggressor, and victims of cultural hysterics…which will pull them in, and forever reduce them to the bitter fate of victimhood, with an unending thirst for revenge…and a life presumed to be “destroyed”, till its very end.

Pedophiles are victims of sexual violation, either literally, or as a defacto “accessory to the crime”…or both…

Pedophiles are further victims of cultural mania…a mania which does not want to allow them an individual, or organized group, voice…a mania which carefully constructs a stereotypical persona…based on what is thought to be the absolute worst, of inhumanity…

Pedophiles are not judged by who and what they are, as individual human beings…

Pedophiles are judged by a strawman…living in a house of cards…

There will always be controversy:

Attempting to draw a line in the sand, and shout, “You can not pass!”, accomplishes nothing…

…and it certainly does not solve problems…

There is a cultural problem, in desperate and dire need of solving…right now…

We can no longer put our heads in the sand, and delay…This is the time for action.

This is why, people like myself are speaking out…This is why I have re-emerged, from a long state of silence.

Fearing those with intentions of righting wrongs, is not how we are going to solve this cultural problem.

Controversies happen all the time…and as a species, we should have learned by now…

…Controversies are not solved, by letting the elite powerful, manipulate all facets of the issue…including all other parties effected and involved.

…Controversies are solved, by giving all parties effected and involved, a place at the proverbial table, where all can speak freely, express their concerns and grievances, make their needs and intentions clear…and come to some sort of mutually beneficial agreement.

What has been going on…is the antithesis, of this process…

…Finding and implementing a solution, has been undermined and sabotaged…

…in exchange for angry mob rule…frenzied by those who would construct scapegoats, and throw about accusations, without care of personal integrity, personal consequence (because there effectively is none, today), and consequence to others around them.

This is wrong…This is immoral and wrong

There will always be opportunists:

…and this is primarily why things have gotten so horrible and abysmal…This has been turned into a literal, cultural war, by opportunists.

For whatever their motivation may be…

…propagation of religion…a misguided, perfectionist ideology of protecting children and their “purity”…a personal, rage wielding axe to grind…exploitation and profit…

…these opportunists, have made an art out of manipulating different classes of people…making it appear as though the needs and desires of one group, are in direct contradiction to the needs and desires of another, or other, groups.

…even going so far, as to make people mistakenly believe, that the needs and desires of some minorities, if ever realized…will, without question, come at the extreme detriment, to another class, or society as a whole…

…As though each group, and all concerned needs, can not under any circumstances, peacefully exist in harmony…

…As though we can never see the good in each other, mutually use these good traits for everyone’s benefit, and get along…without these senseless, ruthless wars, which help nobody…yet devastate many…

Opportunists want you to believe…that because I am a pedophile (though, not the stereotype)…because I openly admit such…because I have pride in this fact…because I will defend myself, and my principles…because I will explain who and what I truly am…because I will express hope for the future…because I am a positive pedosexual…

…this somehow means…that “some small child, somewhere…is going to be taken away, brutally violated…and have their life snuffed out”…

…allegedly, all because I have a voice, and I am not afraid to exercise my voice…

These opportunists would have you believe, that with every single post I make to this blog, I am issuing my “blessing”, on another child being murdered…

…as if to say, that my post is a “death warrant”, for any and all children…

These opportunists, stoop to levels low enough, to evoke such emotion riddled terms as, “spiritual murder”, “emotional rape”, “psychological violence”…to describe even things, which a great many (and I would argue, most) of us would look back on, and remember fondly…happily…

…appealing to some, culture based, “hot button” issues…which are sure to evoke an emotional, and outraged response…instead of a rational response, based on the true facts of the case…

These opportunists want you to believe, that I am here, because I want nothing more than sex with a child…or many of them…

These opportunists want you to believe, that I am harassing victims…and that my presence here, comes at an extreme detriment to victims…

…They want you to believe, that I trivialize the victim, and his/her experience…

…They want you to believe, that I am poking fun at the victim, and trying to hurt them…

They want you to believe, that every possible intention I have behind this blog, and other projects I have been involved with over the years, is nothing but selfish, self centered and evil.

Why I am here:

…This is so complicated, because it entails so many of my life experiences…so many things which are currently going on…and everything about myself, which makes me…me

Personally…I need to see to it…that this scourge of hysteria, is put to an end…

…I need resolution…I need peace in my time…

…but, this means that we all must set at the table, and open our mindswe all must speak and negotiatewe all must find within ourselves, our humanity and mutual respect

I have a hunger…a starving hunger…out of which springs an undying resolve…which shall outlast all hate…

I am the real pedophile…I am the child lover…

I will be herd…I will be seen…I will be understood…and no amount of subterfuge will stop this.

You will know myself, and my kind…for who and what we honestly are…not for some damnable stereotype…created by those who hate…

I know the great positives of childhood sexuality…I was the sexual child, which far to many claim not to exist…and the lies about children and sex, will no longer stand unchallenged by me…

I will call a filthy lie, a filthy lie.

…no matter who utters it…

…and at the foundation of my resolve is this…

I have witnessed far, far, far to many people…man, woman, boy, girl, old, middle age, teenager, small child…fall victim to this cultural mania…

…this fucking cult of crotch politics…

This cult does not care who it destroys, nor how it goes about doing so…It tears individuals and families apart…It takes away, an individuals very ability to live…

…because of this insane, cult notion…that nobody below a variable, legal age, could ever need or want sexual love…this insane cult belief, that children are not human, in every sense…

I personally know, far to many people who live “underground”…in hiding…because of this horrible, maltreatment…

I personally know, at least two, very good, very decent, very caring and loving individuals…who are no threat to society, in any rationally conceivable way…

…and yet, they are setting…caged as though they were violent, dangerous animals…and they will be rotting there, for many, many years…

I have other friends, who will live the remainder of their lives, and die under these circumstances…

Their “horrible” crime…entailed such non-violent, very natural, human things…as having and viewing collections of “child pornography”…

…having young boys in their lives, who they treated with love, honesty and dignity…even when the boy wanted to see and know about sex (just exactly like boys naturally do)…

…resulting in the “terrible” crime of a boy seeing the private porn collection…(that stereotypical, boyhood experience, so many of us remember, and fondly lament over, the rest of our lives).

…touching the boys body…kissing him…on the lips…clothed…naked…on the nipples…the tummy…gently caressing him…sucking his penis…loving him sexually

These “horrible, horrible, horrible” crimes, which some societies do not allow to legally exist…merely because it claims to see no value in them, while purporting extreme danger (sighting highly suspect “research”), and so does not want them to exist…

…these “crimes”, have given special interest groups, and moral elitists, free license to dictate and create victims (both literal, and disingenuous) at will…to attack others…to further their own, social agendas…at the grave peril, of anyone they target.

So many of these targets, do not deserve the fate they are dealt, by these ghastly ruthless people, and their corrupt laws.

What is going on, with all of this legislation, scapegoating, hate and violence against safe, benign, sexual minorities, is a crime against nature…it is a crime against humanity

Yes…of course…I take a stand…

…and I will not stand with hate…I will not stand with intolerance…I will not stand with manipulation…I will not stand with lies…I will not stand with brutal, ruthless aggression…nor will I stand with thinly veiled movements, to murder sexual minorities, under the guise of “law enforcement”…or outrageously as any type of “justice”.

I stand for humanity…and the natural right to be human…


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Suicide Activism?…


Date: May 27, 2007

Should MAA’s plot and publicize their own death, in order to raise awareness to pedophobia?

As a humanist and an atheist…

…it is hard to justify such an approach, when you have no expectancy of existence, past the point of death.

It is a tremendous expression, no doubt, to cut your own life short, and politicize it…but, I have to question whether or not it would hold much weight, in this kind of a political landscape.

People die from suicide all the time…Untold numbers of MAA’s, already have died, and are dying, at their own hands. Sometimes, this does make the news.

…and hate mongers say in unison…”Good!”…

Sometimes, MAA’s are very young when they do this…a far more consequential sacrifice…a far more solid statement…

…and the hate mongers say in unison…”Good! He has so much less time, in which to attack a child!”…

It is not how you die which defines you…but how you lived.

That is why I reject intentionally killing myself, or anyone else, in an attempt to make progress in this fight.

If I can not make a difference, through the efforts that I have made during my life…then my death will not mean a thing.

We are far more useful, in what we consistently do while alive, than any single, isolated “moment” of dissent.

We can hone our skills, and become better at what we are doing, while we are alive…You cant do that when you are dead.

We can make our impact, our impression on this world while we are alive…You cant do that when you are a faceless, suicide statistic.

We can change our world, by winning over the unsure and reluctant…one at a time…You cant do that in a grave.

We may yet get to love another, who we are biologically inclined to love…and they will know, they are loved…After death, that possibility is over.

Personally, I care nothing for being a freak show, that many will gawk at, and even some of the most sympathetic minded of today will, at best, be inclined to view as a “tortured soul”, in dire need of their “guidance” and control.

“Suicidal” is thought to be a mentally ill state of mind, after all…To do this, is playing into their game, by their rules.

There are so many reasons to stay alive, if you can…

…dying prematurely, just takes away experienced, seasoned and dedicated minds.

The problem is going to have to be solved by strategy, and gaining some level of control, over positions of influence, in the larger public.

Dying is not much of a strategy…nor will it get you any control…Your influence will be greatly limited.