To Victims: I Am Sorry (Narrated)…


Date: March 10, 2008

This selection from “In Self Defense: The Life and Times of An Atheist BoyLover…Memoirs and Ethos”, has been narrated by Rocco White. Please enjoy the listen, or read along if you like…or need to.

I feel that I should say something, with respect to angry victims.

I know that there are legitimate victims out there…and I appreciate the gravity of what you have gone through.

I condemn true acts of violation against children, or anyone else.

…I also celebrate free association, and love without false boundaries…I celebrate being a human being, in it’s finest state…I celebrate sharing, teaching and living together in peace.

I celebrate the mind, the body and the pleasures of the human being, regardless of age…

I believe we are alive today…and so, today is the day to seize life…and live life to it’s fullest…because there may not be a tomorrow.

I believe we are all intrinsically sexual as a matter of our very being, and this is not something to be denied…It is something to enjoy, share and nurture.

Like hunger, our bodies naturally crave intimate, sexual touch and release…even at very young ages. I believe, neither this fact of nature, nor our biological needs stemming from it, should be ignored or denied.

I believe that we harm others, by imposing upon them a body stigma, and an inner shame over something so natural and basic as sex and sexuality…something which the human being (especially the young) is powerless to turn off…something which is inseparable from they, themselves.

I believe as a culture, we western civilizations have forgotten something so basic and primal, which many other cultures still understand…that children are sexual too, possessing sexual desires and drives…and that their transition into sexual activities is really quite natural and healthy…It is the most natural thing in the world, to take them into your bed, nurture and develop this aspect of their life…

It is neglectful and abusive not to.

…and we are seeing the fallout, which is inevitable wherever the young are raised to be cold, fearful and distant. They become distrusting, isolated…frustrated, hostile and angry…

The U.S. is the leading developed country, in which prison populations account for one percent of our society…

We have turned our collective back on love, support and closeness…and the sense of well being these things bring with them…

…and because of this, a growing number of our children don’t know how to love…don’t know how to get along in life…They have been neglected so badly, that we have set them up for failure in life.

Is “sex” going to fix all of this?…

…No, of course not…

…but one piece of the puzzle, exists in allowing our young to naturally develop, in a physically and emotionally loving environment…not weighing them down with psychological baggage, over things they cannot help (their inherent sexuality)…and in not only accepting, but embracing them as whole human beings…including their sexuality.

There is no time in a child’s life, where we can separate him from his sexuality, or the needs which come with it…and it is time we started appreciating, and respecting the gravity of this.

The “asexual child” is a myth…It is an artificial social conditioner…and it is a failed effort. The “asexual child” does not exist…

…Please stop treating everyone as though they do…

I know a lot of you are very deeply effected by experiences in your past…I know that many of you are emotionally invested…I know that many of you are very, very sensitive over this issue and issues of child protection…but I also know that a vast many of you are prone towards having a skewed outlook, clouded by your own past…and I know that most of you are only fed “child abuse” statistics from the abuse industry.

I can give you some forgiving allowance, because like most people…it is so hard for you to honestly understand this issue, when disinformation is being thrown at you from every direction, by the mainstream media.

…but, you are going to have to learn that there are more people on this planet, than just people who think specifically like “you”. There are people on earth, who value and love “unconventional” experiences, and this helps to complete their life, making it healthy and happy.

…Who are we to judge, when the primary participants are happy in living their lives like this?…

So long as it is not dangerous…and touching or sucking a boys penis is most emphatically not dangerous, nor is it particularly disturbing to a boy who has never been traumatized by stigma and prejudice…So long as the danger is not there…who are we to judge?…People should enjoy life, and live it to it’s fullest.

We should raise children to be competent, happy and healthy in their sexuality, right along with all other aspects of their life…To fail in this, is to rob them of something beautiful, replacing what should have been one of the best parts of life, with guilt, shame and an inability to accept themselves.

I do not advocate anything which even remotely resembles violence, or true abuse as it would be recognized by any culture not besieged by anti-sexual stigmas and self loathing.

What I advocate, is very easily embraced, by those who clearly understand it, and who are not easily mislead by cultural whims.

…but, you have to have the clear vision to see it for what it is…and the integrity to acknowledge and accept it for what it is…Otherwise, there is a critical divide between us…and we will never be able to trust each other.

Realistically, I don’t expect most of you to understand what I am doing here, or why I must do it. Maybe it is just best for “you”, if I tell you that these expressions are what I have been reduced to as a human being…They are all I have left, and now more than ever…”I” need them…

I don’t expect you to understand it beyond that point…I don’t expect “you” to be any critical part of the evolving child love movement, either…So, it’s not so important that “we” see things eye to eye. Everything will keep moving on…eventually, the future will come to us…and we will all die off.

Things will evolve regardless…and eventually, child lovers will cease being scapegoats. However, I am going to exercise my voice today, in hopes that we can all learn from this conflict, and avoid causing the suffering of future child love generations.

I have spoken to a few unsavory characteristics, which some people in the victim community engage in…But, my work is not intended to be an affront to “you” personally.

In so many ways, it largely does not even concern “you”, or people who have suffered abuse…as “abuse” and “child love” have become confused with one another, yet they are entirely different issues.

I am not a proper target for you, or any rage you may be feeling…nor am I an easy target…so, please just approach with respect, and if you cannot, then leave in peace.

I am absolutely sincere when I tell you how sorry I am to learn of your abuse, plus whatever sexual complications and bitterness resulted out of it…

…but kindly leave the rest of us human beings, who are proud, happy and content with OUR OWN sexuality out of it!

Don’t be jealous…Don’t be envious…Just be happy for us, that we could have this wonderful thing in our lives…

It is time to do away with the terrible things that happened to you…by promoting and supporting the involvement of everyone able, in fun, loving and kind behaviors.

Divert the negative, with the positive…

Lastly, understand that “I” do not owe you anything. I have paid a very high price, on several fronts and through all of my life, in order to still be standing here today, exercising my voice. I have done far more than most people, to pay for the right to speak my mind…I own this right, personally, because I am one of the people from whom this right originates.

You don’t have to like that, but you do have to respect it…and learn to live with it.

A lot of people have suffered and paid dearly…and they exist on every side of this stupid conflict…Know that I am one of countless many…

…and we never asked for this political shit…but since so many have decided to delegate us to this fate…there exists no right, to shelter from the backlash.

We are you!…We love children too!…Get used to it!!

“My kind” is not going away…So we might as well learn to co-exist.



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