There are so many times, when you stop…


Date: Dec. 9, 2008

…and think to yourself…

…”Just where is the line, anyway?”…

I remember one thought which was expressed about another boylover online, who is very active…with his own blog…and he is a published writer, even…

Experiencing the displeasure of happening across the venomous words, of members in a hate cult…I recall one of them saying something to the effect, that they would just keep hounding and chasing him around, online…until all he would be reduced too, is running around in circles, establishing new accounts [blogs, etc] online…and uploading his material, over and over…

…”They” thought that they would essentially neutralise him [and many of us, in fact], by constantly trying to destroy what he had…

…I am glad to see that Viamund is still out there…and his book is still available [which I have considered purchasing, but honestly, that kind of content (haiku’s) is not so much “my thing”].

I wonder, though…to what extent have the hate cults succeeded?…at least for “me”…

Oh, no…no…They have entirely failed to remove me from the internet…that much is steadfastly obvious…and they never had the power to do such…

…but there is something about being mistreated and abused like that [and please understand, I have never released all of the details surrounding this]…which has just left me…chronically outraged and…and feeling like it is high time…and “my turn”, to deal out some proverbial “black eyes”…and this is not the high road, which a humanist should be walking…

“I” am better than those people…I am far better than the whole lot of them…I should be able to walk away, and treat them as though they do not exist…I’ve done so with people who actually meant something to me, yet committed an act of betrayal…I’ve just gone on with my life, leaving them behind…

…but, there is something which ties “me” to this psychological “ball and chain”, and I cant just leave it behind…The very fact that it prompted me to action, and I am now doing all of this work online…and have all of these associations…and several projects…

…This was not all in the name of spiting the hate cult…but then again…

…at times, I find myself putting a halt to proceeding with things I have written…and they will not be published online…because they are violating my own standards…they are taking off the gloves, and using the very first words which come to my mind, and telling those rotten scum, just what I really do think of them, and what they do…and what “I” would like to do to them, because of their bull shit…

I take badly to being pushed around…very, very badly…

…I want to divorce what I am doing today, and the inner feelings which spur me forward, from this whole idea, that I am winning, by merely having the EQF online…like a loud and flamboyant middle finger, stuck inches from the face of every member of that hate cult…

“They” are not why I do this…even though, what they do, is a part of why I am doing this…and I do, desperately at times, want to just tare apart, every single one of those conceited ass holes…

…but, I need to move on…and I need to get back to the original spirit of what I came here for…which was not focused on “those” kinds of people…

I hate those bastards for this…

…It is like the bully, who gangs up with his friends to smear your face in dog shit…and forever, there just is no getting that out of your mind…

Yes, I know…the internet is abundant with people who are trashy, sociopath scum…

It is not as though I was unaware of that kind of person…It is not as though I’ve never stood up to them, or even come out battling with them…

…but “this” was at a time when I was doing something totally unique…and something which “I” totally needed…

…and all those mindless idiots needed to do…was just stay the fuck away…

…Not hard…

…Not “Unthinkable”…

…Not unreasonable…

…It was simply the humane thing to do…

I do hate…I do hate “them”, for corrupting, sullying and perverting what was a personal journey…what was so much better than what they were trying to break it down too…

In “my” time of need…Those fuckers did nothing but attack viciously, with their bloody jaws tearing at me…

There are just far too many stupid people online…and the rest of us intelligent people, who can think and reason…and communicate…

…well…”we” get stuck drowning in the stupidity of these violent, pro-censorship fuckers…

They have infested the internet…and now, we don’t even know if the internet will survive their onslaught of stupidity…

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