Category Archives: In Self Defense: The Life & Times of an Atheist BoyLover

The personal “book” of my life…

In Response To Mario Alejandro Casillas…


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Date: May 26, 2019

01) Mario Alejandro Casillas

Hello, Mario…

“Hey your a pedo sympathizer right? I have questions.”

I am a pedophile BoyLover.

“How do you think pedos get laid do they just go up to a 7 year old ask em out to dinner then wait till the third date?”

Where it comes to intergenerational relationships of that nature, discard the stereotypical models of “adult sex”. The dynamics are not the same, and the manifestations cannot be entirely the same.

That said…in a civilization which understands, values and respects intergenerational love…the scenario of an adult taking a child out to dinner, or to places where they can spend time together, would not be particularly strange or ill viewed.

Most modern cultures would have to experience radical changes, before any supportive social framework existed, which these types of relationships could honestly exist in.

“What if the child doesn’t understand what their asking?”

This is a failure on the part of culture and civilization.

Children should not be forced into sexual ignorance…

…If sex is not hidden from them, and they see the activities in culture…whenever they seek it out…they will have something on which they can base a decision, to self elect into some form of sexual activity.

” What if they don’t consent?”

Then it is an abuse.

“Is there an age limit for children or it’s ok no matter what the age.”

That is a very deep, sometimes volatile, question…since nepiophilia [the sexual love of infants and toddlers] is also a factor.

As I see it…this primarily hinges on the tolerance and temperament of the civilization.

Some are intelligent and progressive enough…to see things for what they are.

It’s little known or talked about today…but attitudes to sex [and sexual touch] were radically different in some regards, only a century back…and earlier.

Mothers and other family members orally sucking a small boys penis [to calm him, etc.], was once considered a total non-issue…simple child rearing…The practice has been recorded in writings, and even paintings…

…In France…there was once a time when the family structure was such that…a young [10…11…12…13…] boy’s first sexual companion would normally be his own mother…and this would commonly last until he took on a wife, and/or moved out of the home.

These were pragmatic social decisions, the larger culture saw nothing shocking or horrendous about.

Contrary to the “we learned better, and put a stop to it” opinion…these practices were a casualty of sharply changing moral outrage…Previously, they worked out quite splendidly in their cultures…People who morally object, like to cast a dark shadow on such practices, and act as though they were on par with slavery, or something…They also like to carry on, as if these things “must have been traumatic, and obviously not enjoyable”…There is no reason for this conclusion, other than ignorance and bigotry.

The first example I just gave, easily falls into the behavioral realm of nepiphilia…even if the people doing it, were not strictly nepiophiles.

Is it possible for civilization to afford sexual intimacy to children of all ages?…

…Yes…it unquestionably is…It already has been, in the not so distant past.

Should there be an age cut off?…

…This is a question every civilization has to confront, debate, wrestle over, and make a decision regarding.

“Do you think pedos get the right to do things to children that potentially aren’t old enough to have had ‘the talk’?”

Well…pedophiles are people who are attracted to children in the roughly six to twelve age range…Generally speaking, if sex is not hidden from children in the culture…then they would be old enough to have some sort of “the talk”.

Nepiophiles would be the more complicated discussion to be had…provided a culture agrees “the talk” is such a vital thing, for every single form of sexual encounter.

If the culture is more lax, and has an eased mind about things like simple, gentle touch…then does “a talk” really hold so much importance, when that is all the child ever experiences?

Hebephiles [who are attracted to people going through puberty] and ephebophiles [who are attracted to young people in their teens, who’ve passed through puberty], are generally accepted as being attracted to people who are likely to have had such a talk.

As a side…I’ve never understood the whole ridiculousness surrounding “the talk”…a generally uncomfortable encounter, with someone you’ll never have sexual relations with…who you don’t really even want to have such a discussion with…quickly dumping a bunch of “sex facts” onto you, and never bringing the topic up again…

…as if this is how human sexuality even should be approached.

It’s pathetic and ridiculous…as are cultures who think this is how things should be.

“Do you also support rape culture and believe rape should be legal?”

No, and no…

The timing of your questions is kind of interesting, as I just recently [within the last week] wrote something relevant to this, for my “In Self Defense” series.

In all honesty…I am a pragmatic moderate…I am against forced celibacy…I am against forced sexual activity…I am against forced sexual ignorance…I am for self elected, sexual freedom.

Many people will say that “children cannot understand sex”…

…And of course they cannot understand it, when the very same people making such claims, are among the people making certain children never see, or learn anything about sex

This is an unnatural state of being…which takes naturally sexual beings, and makes sexually dysfunctional beings out of them.

I strongly recommend reading the Growing Up Sexually archive, which catalogues a very large collection of historical examples, where children and teens have been both expected and tolerated, to be engaged in sexual activity.

Childhood sexuality has been far more tolerated throughout history, than most people imagine.

When we take an honest look at it…the claims of “trauma and injury” fall flat.

“This is not meant as an attack I’m just curious to how the mind of a pedo support guy works.”

I appreciate that…Thank you.


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I Confess Last Nights Dream…


ISDLogo
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Date: April 10, 2019

I – a pedophile – got away with something last night…

…Entirely without intention or trace…it was “the perfect crime”…involving nobody but myself…and nothing but the fruits of my biological processes…

I had a dream…This was not an ordinary dream, but an ultra rare dream…My senses were all present, and vivid…

…I could feel his weight…I could feel his soft skin…I could taste his soft skin…I could feel his small penis…I saw his face and his short, blond hair…I saw and experienced the pajamas he was wearing…and I’d have to estimate he was about seven years old…

I don’t know I’d say I entirely condone what took place in that dream…as there wasn’t any talking…and no back story to set it up…We were just two male humans, there in a bedroom…apparently prior to going to bed…or just after waking up.

At any rate…I got pulled along with the events unfolding…just as this boy was…I did not know what was about to happen…It just started happening…

The boy was, presumably, a product of my unconscious mind…unless it’s possible to jump into another persons dream…and interact with them in that setting…which I don’t specifically believe is possible…but I’ve had very strange experiences in my life, which go beyond simple explanation…So…who knows?…

…Maybe there’s a blond haired, seven year old boy wearing blue pajamas, who also woke up extra happy today?…somewhere else in this world?…

No…It probably all happened, isolated in my own head…

There is no such thing as voodoo molestation, after all…Right?

…But what an amazing super power that would be…visiting people in their dreams…

I should be clear, before saying just how utterly real the dream was…I don’t have any real world experience with fondling a seven year old boys penis, through his pajamas…So, technically…I don’t know that this experienced dream was indistinguishable from the real thing…I don’t have memories of the real thing, to compare it with.

This experienced dream was without shame…or fear…it just was…it just happened, in a completely free zone…without judgement…

…And it was very nice…an all too rare treat, my unconscious brain gives me…once every several years.

There is no physical trace of it…There’s no psychological trauma from it…You cannot judge or prosecute me, for having had this experience…which to my mind, was indistinguishable from a real world experience, while it was unfolding in my dream…

…I just wish I knew…how to force these kinds of dream to happen…because I haven’t had nearly enough of them…

This one BoyLover friend of mine…we’re very estranged from each other [in a “drifting apart” kind of way]…I remember him once saying, that he always had these kinds of dreams after eating a spicy, pepperoni pizza…

…I thought he was just joking around…but, I’ve been eating on a double pepperoni pizza for the last two days…

…Hmmm…

…He may have been onto something.


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“Child Is Not a Gender”…

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Date: March 21, 2019

I agree…”Childhood” is objectively not a gender…

…But they are physically different from adults…and when someone is most sexually attracted to that childhood difference, it is objectively part of their sexuality…hence, how they are sexually oriented.

Pedophilia is a defining factor of ones sexual orientation…just like being attracted to adults is a defining factor of ones sexual orientation.

People act like “homosexual” and “heterosexual” are the only things considered, when we talk about how an individuals sexual orientation manifests…and that is short sighted folly.

When the differences between physical childhood and physical adulthood are so wide…it’s important to recognize that either orientation is very different…and it is justified to recognize the differences.

“Childhood” does not need to be it’s own gender.

It is entirely inconsequential, to the question of whether pedophilia is a sexual orientation.

As a pedophile…I ask why there are people out there, who imagine they can disallow us the ability, to define and qualify our own sexual orientation?

It does not matter, that some people are uncomfortable with these facts…

…This is the way things happen to be…It’s not going to change, to suit anyone’s narrow comfort zone.


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Holocausted From Humanity: The ‘Taint’ of a Pedophiles Money (Narrated)…


ISDLogo
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Date: March 03, 2019

01) LOUSE OF LORDS Vile paedophile campaigner invited to plush champagne bash at the House of Lords

This selection from “In Self Defense: The Life and Times of An Atheist BoyLover…Memoirs and Ethos”, has been narrated by Rocco White. Please enjoy the listen, or read along if you like…or need to.
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You want an understanding of just how messed up the paranoia has become?…Take a look at this…and keep in mind that this is absolutely not the first time, charity money has been returned to “pedophiles” upon the mere discovery that they are “pedophiles”.

“Twice-jailed Tom O’Carroll, 73, was among up to 60 guests who were thanked last December for donating money to a children’s book charity.

Book Aid International, which provides books for children in sub-Saharan Africa, said it was unaware of O’Carroll’s past and has launched an investigation.

The charity said he had given less than £500 in three instalments since 2015, which has been refunded.

A spokesman for the House of Lords said: “Parliament takes its safeguarding responsibilities towards children, young people and vulnerable adults very seriously.

Our safeguarding policy has been developed to ensure we provide a safe environment and fulfil our safeguarding responsibilities.”

What are they presuming?…

…that a small donation to Book Aid International, gets you a “roll in the bushes” with sub-Saharan African children?…

…or that Tom was “hoping” such would be the case?…

Pedophiles do give out of the goodness of their heart:

I know it’s very unfashionable to say this…especially given that pedophiles are so dehumanized in the modern world, that there are some people out there who honestly believe…”everything a pedophile does, should be presumed motivated by an ultimate goal of having sex with children”…

…but we are just people…we are part of the culture…we respond to social needs, and social goods, just like anybody else.

I’m no great philanthropist…but I have given to children’s charities, many times over during my lifetime…

Happily…nobody knew I was a pedophile…so the money was never returned to me…and it went to it’s intended goal [presumably].

Pedophiles should not be stripped of their generosity, charity and ability to do real good:

This is, hands down, one of the worst things about what a society does to “pedophiles”…and about these kinds of sensationalistic “news” articles…

…That society proactively behaves in such a way…as to very publicly “cancel out” and refuse to acknowledge, every single time that a “pedophile” does something objectively good in this world.

It is as if they believe, we are not allowed to be any part of society…or culture…or take part in good acts…or be recognized for those good acts.

It is ludicrous…to think that a donation of money, to a charity serving children on an entirely separate continent, constituted any form of “danger” to children…

…Tom was helping to foster the reading and mental growth, of children from Africa!

…And these miserable misers stole both this generous act of kindness, and that £500, from those children!

Do not tell me that “normal” people donated £500, to make up for the loss caused by this witch hunt…as sometimes happens in these very situations…

…Those people are some of the worst, virtue signaling, self glorified elements in all of this…They are every bit as bad, as the people who work to derail the natural kindness of a “pedophile”.

What they have done…is downright vulgar and vile.


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Does the Hope Keep Me Sane?…

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Date: February 06, 2019

01) fusewire: Pedophilia is a mental disorder

“I honestly don’t get it. After all these years, it still confuses me how some of you exist. The only way I can explain people like yourselves is that you’re doing everything you can to avoid the hell that I face head on every day. You convince yourselves, either consciously, or subconsciously, that one day you’ll be lucky enough to feel the warmth of a naked boy.

Maybe you need that hope to get through each day. Without this delusion that you immerse yourselves in, you’d develop this so called “pedophilic disorder”, the type of hell that I experience everyday. Or maybe you’re just a bunch of pederasts or non-exclusives who wouldn’t have a clue what a sane exclusive pedophile has to deal with with 24/7.

And I know now. I don’t want to become you. With or without the attractions.”

Do you know why I do what I do?…

…It’s to carry a little extra weight, in pushing back against a culture, all to happy to pull the rest of us off the tracks…pull us down and destroy us…

…I resist, with extreme prejudice, the devolving of our world into chaos, due to extreme paranoia…over what “I”, you or whomever, is allegedly “plotting to do to their children”…

I don’t let other peoples notions about me, dictate my own grasp on reality…nor my ability to inform my own grasp on reality.

Does this practice help keep me sane?…Absolutely!…You bet it does!…

I think most of us would be in a psych ward, or dead, if we constantly internalized 99% of what careless and cruel people say about us.

I can see nothing wrong, or immoral, about this approach.

This world is often absurd…Am I supposed to feel shame, over defending fair truth, all because some don’t want to know it?

Ultimately…I am at peace with myself, for who and what I am [an exclusive pedophile]…because I know from life experience, that most of what they claim about me is dead wrong…and an indefensible lie…

While it’s true that most people never came asking for my experiences, opinions and views…it’s also true, that I never asked to be subjected, to a world saturated with hostile, rotten lies…

…If this world can impose it’s cruelty upon me…I can impose my optimistic integrity upon it, in kind…

This world made me exactly what I presently am…

…Given the way this world savagely treats people like us…I would think people should be happy, that I’ve turned out like I have.


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Media Interview [Almost]…


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Date: February 06, 2019

Note: This is an old 2014 incident, and I have since distanced myself from even doing the “Media Interviews Page”, which I believe I reference somewhere in the below comments. I was still doing relatively okay in 2014…A lot has changed since then…My ability to really do that project well, has slipped away. I offer what follows, primarily because it displays a very real struggle I was having, when asked to do a live interview on [Canadian] national television…Even the choice I made, was gut wrenching for me.


February 10, 2014

01) Lend me your incite?…

There are a lot of reasons, as to why I do my own things in my own time…It is hard to dance around everything in my life…Some of those things just aren’t…simple…Some of them aren’t even rational, but that does not stop their effects.

I live with telephobia [it may have a more exotic name, but I fail to recall it]…and probably at least one other identifiable social phobia…things I never tend to talk about, out in the open. Some days are much worse than others…and you never can forecast it…Whatever it is, it is there in the moment…or the day…I sometimes have a really hard time, even calling my own mother on the phone.

I feel like I relentlessly wrestle with a lot of ridiculous, stupid shit in my life…most of which, I just cannot escape…Then I find an environment where I can transcend all of that, and become more than I otherwise am…the internet compliments whatever strengths I have…It lets me mask my weakness.

Right now, I am faced with something that is invading my little utopia and my escape from everything else in life…

I was passed a link, about a week back…A Canadian news program was taking issue with Dr. James Cantor’s statement, that pedophilia is a sexual orientation…Cantor refused to be interviewed by them…And they had this female reporter, who did a hatchet job…complete with cliché visuals, and a parade of individuals to provide their own spooky forecast…After which, she and the show anchor went on a tirade for several minutes…I’m sure, you’ve mostly heard it all before.

…Being the opinionated big mouth that I am…I did what comes natural, and what I’ve done a few times in the past when confronted with such an outrageous violation of honest journalism…and I dissected the entire report…

What I took issue with, was not anything about Dr. Cantor or any disagreements that may have been expressed…but with the manner in which this “journalism” completely side stepped the base question [whether pedophilia is a sexual orientation] and the reason behind such a conclusion…Instead opting to parade the usual manner of guest, including a high profile victim of child sex abuse…Of all the guests they interviewed, not a single one of them had anything of substance to say about pedophilia being acknowledged as a sexual orientation, nor the reasons behind doing such [some being valid]…they just objected to it happening…It seems more of a culture clash in Canada, because their charter of rights grants strong protections to recognized sexual minorities…

…I really don’t have a lot to say about Dr. Cantor’s research…I mean…”less white brain matter”…”more left handed”…”lower IQ”…and all the controversy over his sample pool…

What can I say?…Until the day comes, when we can all openly participate in research which concerns and effects us…without such research getting derailed, by those with nothing better to do with themselves than being a public menace…then what does get accomplished, will remain unreliable…because it is incomplete in scope…the test samples will be limited…And given historic trends, they will remain corrupted by artificial bias and duress imposed upon them.

It just feels so trivial, to make much of a comment about any of it…

…But I did skewer the “report” [which really just had a bunch of people, expressing how bad they feel about calling pedophilia a sexual orientation]…I pointed out a lot of propaganda employed in it…a lot of bias…the total absence of anybody to discuss the base question…and I offered a perspective or two, regarding a thing or two…

Along the way, I referred to the reporter and anchor as “two bozos”, and summed the “report” up as tripe…and said I would not have given them an interview, either…especially not if that is their known mode of operation…

For this…I have been invited by the shows producer, to be interviewed live by phone or Skype…

I don’t know if they’re hard up for interview guests…if someone got honestly intrigued by my comments…or if they just want a circus freak, so the fur can fly in an upcoming episode…

…I shun these things…and even made a point of clearly stating so, on one of the pages I have linked at my blog…I effectively decline all such invitations, by default…I’ve seen too many “pedophiles” call in, or go onto shows…and I know how quickly things can get nasty, and out of hand…The last thing you want, is to be where you have no control over the environment of exchange…and where things may be prone to break down into chaos…and I just flat out don’t trust the integrity of that show…even with as little as I have seen of it.

I still feel very bad about walking away from this…It’s like, I’ve been active all of these years…and now something has fallen into my lap…I want to be optimistic, and seize the ball that is in my court…I do feel entitled…I also think, there is a bigger issue at hand which dwarfs me…

…I am just so sick to death, of poor behavior trends in the media…How can any self aware pedosexual, with a sense of self worth, not be offended by it?…They dehumanize and demean us as a class, in front of the world and at their own leisure…It has a very deep impact, and it is part of the larger problems so many of us chronically face.

For now…I am going to sleep on it, for another night…

…I don’t see myself doing this.

I know that a few others from BoyChat have been confronted with this sort of thing.


02) I officially declined…

I am not doing the interview.

…And for the time, I am going to hold off with any alternative offer.

I will be building a resource more substantive and boldly present, modeled after the idea Randy offered…Where people from the media can interact with me, if they so choose…Maybe it will be a positive thing…or entirely ignored…I don’t know.

So, now I have something additional to build…It’s kind of funny, because in the back of my mind…I kind of thought I was maybe getting a bit big headed, by even creating my original page which addresses visitors from the media, and presumes that some of them might want to interview me…It’s been there on my blog all along…you just have to look for it, a bit…Even I didn’t really believe, anyone was ever going to float an offer to me like this…Then, there it was…

As to Sun News…I just don’t feel good about walking into that…I think it’s just more wise to stay away…and I can maintain my personal dignity, in that knowledge.

Thank you for your addition to that thread, Sherry…I appreciated that…and responded to it, also.

Thank you, to everyone who gave feedback.


February 11, 2014

03) Diverse Responses…

…and thank you, for them.

They seem very well spread out, amongst the major options…So, I’m not really seeing so much of a trend.

Well, let me walk you through my present line of thought…

– I am painfully aware, that a lot of impact is lost in electing not to go live…and not to interact live. In an ideal circumstance, I think this is best…but I don’t even know the circumstance to expect, and behavior I have witnessed does not look promising.

– It says a tremendous amount, that Dr. Cantor refused to go onto their show live, while he is in the midst of promoting his own research [be it what it is]…He has got to know something about their character and conduct, and that is probably the most important clue to take away from this.

– …I don’t want to get on live to find out…”Oh, by the way…we also have on the phone another guest, to go irate over anything you say, and constantly interrupt you!”…ala Jack McClellan on Fox news, with two obnoxious idiots who refused to shut their mouths [almost ever], endless interruptions and refusals to allow Jack to even give a response, and a host who not only refused to enforce/maintain control but who joined in on the feeding frenzy…

I can’t quite see myself being pushed around like that…but it’s a fine line between asserting yourself, and coming off looking unprepared, and like you’ve lost control of yourself in the face of being provoked.

– Even though I do put myself out there a good deal more than most have…It was never my intention to get onto the mainstream media interview circuit…I don’t consider myself well suited for it…and I cannot even imagine, that I would be the best fit candidate amongst us.

– I remember hearing, or reading [maybe it was Joe Power who said this…or maybe it’s just on their website] NAMBLA is extremely reserved and selective about who they grant interviews to…I have found this a good sentiment to mirror. I think it is worse to allow someone to play you on live media and make you look like an incompetent spectacle…than it is to weather the innuendo that gets thrown at you, for refusing to answer “whatever”…We even saw a bit of that, aimed at Dr. Cantor…

– I have no formal training at giving interviews [or speeches, for that matter]…and I am fairly confident, going in front of a large audience like that would send my blood pressure through the roof.

– I wont use Skype…have not used it in years…I do have at least one spare cell phone, registered under false information…I’d have to buy time and activation for it…To be honest, I’d rather it just remain in storage.

For these and other reasons I’ve already mentioned…and despite that my “magic 8 ball” told me to do it, and reaffirmed itself in a follow up…I am going to decline a live interview…and I am also going to make that page I was talking about in my original post, stick out a lot more on my blog.

– I am not going to invite them here. 😉

…Unless by chance, enough others here concur this is a good idea…and intend to be on good behavior.

Someone has been visiting my links page…Chances are, they may have already seen BoyChat…provided they explored my blog long enough.

– I was leaning more towards MWM and yoyoboy…but I do really appreciate Randy’s input…and I could literally share those files through my blog…You can, in fact, link directly to media files…and make those links publicly available for anyone to download…So, there is some potential there…Plus, it is what it is, but I have a history of recording comments and such, and sharing them online…Anyone caring to explore my blog long enough, will happen upon some of these files.

…So, what Randy suggests is actually complimenting what I’ve tended to do, in the past…I just didn’t tend to do this so much, in response to exact comments and questions aimed at me by another person.

“By the way, it’s nice to know Kamil’s tweets on behalf of your post bore fruit.” — Bernie Najarian

You know, I was kind of wondering about that…who sent the tweet to them…

I got a tweet, and did what I do [when I have the time and energy]…Then I got that e-mail…Kind of felt like I got unwittingly swept up into something…Not that I’m saying this is bad…But obviously, I do have deep considerations to keep in mind…which makes it complicated.

I am not prepared to do something half-witted and unprepared, over the notion of taking a heroic stand.

– Guy Fawkes mask?…

…You truly are poetic, slvrspun. 🙂

I don’t own one…nor do I wish to be associated with “anonymous”, in any way…

I did use a picture of that mask, along with a quote from “V for Vendetta”, in one of my October blog headers, however…I’ve had reverence for that quote for years, and I did it for my own reasons…I have kind of wondered, if a few people out there through a fit over that.

…But, no…I don’t see myself doing anything in front of a camera…That’s just not an option.

– wikwik…

I have not actually considered disguising my voice…and to be entirely honest, hate going that rout. If I can pre-record and release responses to a list of questions [as Randy suggests], it would be very easy for me to alter my voice…I have a lot of neat software, and have been a user of Magix Music Maker for many years.

I also have voice changing software…which might work with Skype…though I don’t intend on doing something like this over Skype.

Believe me…it weighs heavy on me, that this is rare and likely won’t repeat itself. There are pros and cons to doing this or not doing this, no matter what style it is approached.

I also don’t want to lose face, by just slinking away from it.

I don’t know what their intention is [I don’t even know what angle they have in mind]…It would be foolish, to anticipate the better…And after re-reading my post…well…it felt tame, laid back and reserved while I was writing it…But I am sure it could get very awkward, butting heads with people I called bozos, and who’s production I called tripe…

…and as a side note, I also gave my condolences to the shows anchor [don’t recall his name], because of his stunted orientation…He did not understand, how anyone can be attracted to children, you see?…

…It’s just part of my peculiar humor.

…They probably don’t love me.


04) Thanks Sherry!

It is hard to explain what it is like…holding yourself back, because you simultaneously don’t want to do what you badly want to do…

…”There’s the cheese on the trap.”…right?

There are valid reasons behind all options, and each one is guaranteed to inflict a price…I guess the question is, what price can you best live with.

I agree with you, Sherry…Sun News seems to be a poor venue, for holding a meaningful dialogue.

I won’t be doing anything live with them…and this may just end up being the foundation for something a little bit more substantive and obvious, where it comes to my page directed at those in the media who are interested in me.

I’m still undecided if I want to offer a compromised alternative, such as what Randy suggests. It is less than ideal…They can say anything they like without challenge, after airing a recorded statement. It is always best, I think…to promptly confront misunderstandings and false statements, which are offered in that sort of venue. If you are not there, present…then you grant them license to go on another exchange amongst themselves, and bring in whomever they please to join in…That is where the mess threatens to happen…They could pull a Hetty Johnston, for example.

I am not unwilling to do it…it’s just that I am unconvinced that doing this will be better…In it’s own way, it could be worse.

I’d have to get them to agree to air anything I sent to them, unedited…and then to link back to me, so I could further address anything they might bring up.

I am questioning if this isn’t a bit too tacky and burdensome, to hold the attention of most people in the event some type of drawn out exchange happened [on air, or by peripheral venues].

Potential “up” sides, are free publicity for my blog and other projects…Though I’d very seriously rather have the revamping of my links pages [which I’m currently undertaking] done and in place, before such attention hit.

On top of everything else to consider…this is bad timing for me.

Would it be convoluted for me to say…that I feel like I was born to carry a message, that this is the path my life has derived larger meaning from, and that this is why I feel so awful about doing nothing in the face of even poor opportunities?

…As this continues to linger on and get old [they sent message about two weeks ago, but I only logged into my account and discovered it four days ago]…I feel like I should make a decision and get to it…Not sure I am done mulling this over, however.


05) 🙂

I could think of very few people in the media, where going live onto their show to discuss these things comes off as a good idea…and who knows if they’d touch it?

A large part of my reason for bringing this here, was just that I wanted to let it set a bit…and get more perspectives to chew this over with.

No matter the rational…I am glad to see the cautionary voices coming out…It’s too easy to do something rash, in the excitement of the moment.

…This is what helps keep people grounded.


06) One thing I wonder…

“They were not going to interview you, they were going to bombard you.”

…You see, it was not entirely clear…

Though I interpreted it as an interview invitation, because there was bound to be back and forth dialogue…the actual phrasing, was that I’d be allowed to come onto the program live, and respond…

Obviously, the guy saw my post and knew it was a response to their “report”…I don’t know if they expected me to come on and make a refutation, or discuss the projected image of pedosexuals in the media…or try to give some sort of perspective on Dr. Cantor’s work…or even just defend that “pedophilia is an orientation”…

…I don’t think this was necessarily about “me”…But that question remains up in the air.

They probably don’t encounter a lot of people, with strong opinions and incite on these issues that contradict pop culture wisdom.

Thank you for your incite, sir sympathy…

I strongly suspect you, and others, are correct…Likely no matter what slant, it would have devolved.

I don’t expect to get cozy with people like that…On the contrary…If the mood hits, I expect to skewer more such “reports” in the future…

…Just hope others appreciate [or at least forgive and ignore, if they find it not to their taste] my appetite for chewing up such things…

…I guess, contrary to what I [and at least one other person in this thread] thought…a page directed at interested people from the media is of valid use for me…I may have to decline future invitations…even if it is because a certain someone else thinks I’m a fool.


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Of Course, I Care About Real Dangers to Children and Youth…


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Date: February 05, 2019

“Don’t you care about the dangers to children?”

Of Course, I Care About Real Dangers to Children and Youth…

Why do you think I am sexually celibate, and have been so for nearly all of my life?…

…Largely, it is because I recognize the wide range of dangers posed, by the zealots of this world…

…I recognize these dangers first and foremost, to children and teens…just as I also recognize these threats towards people like myself.

I’m sexually celibate for a range of reasons…but at the top of that list, is the fact that this neurotic world cannot seem to mentally handle a sexually active pedophile…and I don’t want to put anyone else through all of that insanity…much less a child, or youth.

…Is this “not caring enough”?…

…Is this somehow, in any way…”not putting a child/youth’s wellbeing, above my own”?…

I’ve sacrificed and risked an outright devastating amount over the past decade plus…to introduce some level of humanity into a volatile subject matter…and speak humanely, in the just support of children, youth, MAPs and any other minority, or individual, I’ve witnessed being devastated by the political machine.

I’ve always stood up for that proverbial “witch being burned at the stake”…

…Because I’ve seen it way too many times, that that “witch” has never gotten a fair or just trial.

People judge and condemn you, based upon solely what is going on in their own heads…But rarely based upon what is objectively happening, in the real world.

I do care about the dangers in this world…I care about and fear them, more than you will ever know…

…This is exactly why, I stand up against the many dangers posed, by the dogmatic, zealot establishment.

We have far to many real problems to contend with in this world, without having to allow the establishment to create and impose false problems upon us.

This life in this world, should never be all about everybody creating endless problems for everybody else…

…Yet…this seems to be, just what so many are relentless in pursuing.

…They keep pushing, and pushing, and pushing…imagining nothing is ever going to give…and there is never going to be an explosive backlash…

I care deathly serious…because I don’t want to see the day…when the world has devolved so wretchedly…that loving people like myself are forced to pick up arms, in order to defend ourselves from hostile aggressors.

…Again…why do you think I’ve been talking and writing about deeply personal issues, all these many years?

…I’ve been vested in the process of practical, social negotiation…in hopes that we might avoid something far more dire and bloody, in our shared future.

That’s right…

…I even care about how this is going to impact the aggressors of this world, who have ultimately caused this entire problem.


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Don’t You Care It’s Been Proven, Sex Releases Chemicals Into A Child/Youth’s Body, Which Causes Damage to the Child/Youth’s Developing Body?…


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Date: February 04, 2019

“Don’t You Care It’s Been Proven, Sex Releases Chemicals Into A Child/Youth’s Body, Which Causes Damage to the Child/Youth’s Developing Body?”

This is one of the newer claims being pushed, by people searching for their “holy grail” of condemning early life sexuality…or, strangely…intergenerational, sexual relationships…They seem to be mostly obsessed with the latter, while private and “age mate” sexual experiences are accepted as normal and healthy…[Answer that puzzle for me, please, all of you “know it all”s out there]…

Where it comes to demonized, politically volatile issues such as early life human sexuality…fields of research such as this, have given us absolutely no reason to trust them…

…In fact…just the opposite is true…and there needs to be a massive house cleaning, in this field of research.

So…we know without question…we cannot even trust them to get basic, “No Duh!”, common sense facts straight about sexual relations during childhood…We know that they actively conceal and mislead, where it comes to representing these things…We know they are, effectively, an enforcement
arm of the government…and that they are overwhelmingly pushing an agenda, of stern, social conformity…

…Are we supposed to be shocked, when they ignore the masses of people who’ve had lots of sexual relations, or even just masturbated like utter hell, during their childhood and teen years, who all turned out just fine…and pull this “chemically stunted development” B.S. out of their own rear ends?

You want me to give even the slightest of credence to this obvious flimflam?…

The field of research needs to be flushed of it’s dogmatic malcontents…

…Then, the question at hand needs to be vigorously tested and studied…

…Then, if any substantiation is found…it needs to be determined how, if at all, this affects sexual content in reasonable moderation…

…It also needs to be established, by what path children and teens who masturbate regularly [sometimes more than once a day], are immune to this alleged “chemical damage”…and why they are not far more concerned about that method of releasing these sex chemicals into the body, as it is clearly far more common and prevalent.

You see…people [including “the professionals”] run into a problem, when they start trying to pass this stuff off in front of people like me…Because I am not inexperienced…I am not uneducated…I am not uninformed…I am not stupid…and I recognize their glaring double standards.

This supposed “sex chemical damage” is just another one of their instances, of language and psychological manipulation.

Don’t fall for it…It’s an absurdity, on it’s face.


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Aren’t You Just Arguing, Because You Want to Have Sex with Children, and You’re Bitter That You Can’t?…


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Date: February 03, 2019

“Aren’t You Just Arguing, Because You Want to Have Sex with Children, and You’re Bitter That You Can’t?”

If I am bitter over anything at all…it is the grotesque dishonesty and outright cruelty, in which society has approached and dealt with human sexuality.

On a personal and practical level…I grew up and developed in this sex negative culture, which perpetually punishes you for being a sexual being…

…Consequently…I’ve never had any personal expectations, of being sexually active with anybody at all.

…And at one point in my life, I was quite at peace with how things are…

…It’s when I stepped forward [along with many other MAPs], to offer something deeply personal for the betterment of humankind…just to begin my path of discovery, on how vicious the manipulation of social sexual policies is…and it’s depths…that I began to understand what has been going on…and what continues to go on…

…And we are not talking about one incident…We are talking about being slapped down, when we were doing something positive and constructive, followed by layers and layers of continued attack and oppression, observed and discovered over the span of years.

The problem with human cultures…is that they commonly attack any elements within them, which are not conforming to “the majority”…instead of recognizing the strengths those “minorities” bring to the culture.

I confess…I have become overwhelmingly cynical, over societies claim that it “wants to end sexual violence”…when it wont even honestly look at human sexuality, itself…

…I am cynical over the preposterous notion…that society has any interest, in being fair and decent to the human beings within it.

…There are good and decent people in society…

…But in large part…society is filled with self centered, dogmatic a-holes, who revel in the destruction and torment of others…

…This society revels in, and functions on, the practice of creating victims of all type…

…And that is one hell of a justification for cynicism…and for being bitter…

For the record…I’m actually quite up beat and positive…in spite of everything.

Tellingly…this last point tends to enrage the aforementioned a-holes, all the more…

…I guess they imagine…someone like me, isn’t supposed to get any form of satisfaction out of life…at all…and it pisses them off, when they discover a pedophile is taking satisfaction somewhere out of this existence.


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Do You Really Believe That Allowing Kids to Openly Choose An Adult or Peer Sexual Companion, Will Reduce Sexual Brutality?…


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Date: February 02, 2019

“Do You Really Believe That Allowing Kids to Openly Choose An Adult or Peer Sexual Companion, Will Reduce Sexual Brutality?”

Although I disagree with some of the notions surrounding it…I am encouraged by the more recent trend, in which people are calling for the lifting of celibacy on Catholic priests…

…It shows that some people understand…you cannot suppress the sexuality in a sexual being, and expect that there aren’t going to be very negative consequences…

In the cases of the priests…many have [allegedly] forced themselves sexually, upon children and youth…in a setting which is extremely contradictory to such behavior, and without the child/youth’s explicit interest in said behavior, with said priest.

If people can wrap their minds around the fact…that sexually satisfied priests will be unlikely to engage in such unwanted behavior…it seems to me…the only thing seriously holding us back, is the people who stubbornly hang onto the sexual superstition…that “children [and youth] are not sexual beings”…when clearly they are.

It’s one of the all time, big social lies…which everybody is expected to repeat, and pretend that it’s true…when deep down…we know that it is not…In our gut, we know it is not true…If we look into the research, we know that it is not true…Yet, we are expected to behave as though it were true, to enforce an ideology about “how society is supposed to function”…

…And the sexual child is supposedly “so dangerous”, to the alleged way that “society is supposed to function”.

Truth in this matter is…if we would get real…and just start approaching the reality of sexual children, and their needs, as they exist…we would be light years ahead of where we are now, where it comes to addressing child on child, youth on youth, youth on child and child on youth, sexual brutality.

As things stand…we are perpetually mired down, in closing our eyes and displaying a complete denial…over what is so obviously right in front of us.

Here is what I propose:

Children and youth need complete sexual education…They need a legally recognized right to sexual expression…They need open options…They need someone, who can give positive structure to their sexuality…be that a peer or someone older…

This is the only practical way…in which we will have any chance in reducing real child on child, youth on youth, sexual violence.

We have to start being real about things…and start helping children and youth manage their sexuality…

…Otherwise…by default…we are embracing and fostering, the rape of children and youth, which happens at the hands of children and youth.

…and we don’t want that…

…Do we?


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