Monthly Archives: January 2007

(Out of ) Focus on the Family…

Date: January 25, 2007

01) (Out of ) Focus on the Family

“Dobson’s camp has publicized a small portion of the story on gay “rehabilitation.” Dr. Robert Spitzer, author of often quoted research, tells us the rest of the story, including how hard it was to gather a sample group for the study.”

Two things that I really dislike about the modern social climate of research…

a) Notice how Dr. Robert Spitzer says he’d be hesitant to even start this kind of research today…

…The sort of opportunistic distortion of James Dobson, and similar people and groups, represent a threat to research…Because less people are going to want to give them anything at all, which they can use deceptively against sexual minorities.

This is bad for research.

b) The distortion which corrupts people’s understanding of research and studies, is completely out of control.

A lot of people with social agendas, like James Dobson, try to capitalize on [sometimes even monopolize] research, which upon closer examination, was not even intended for the end goals of people like himself.


Not Even Pedophilia (Narrated)…


Date: January 21, 2007

Things I would say differently today:

This commentary fails to note that children and teenagers, combined with andriophiles, make up the lions share of “child sexual assault” cases.

Even though there was something I felt kept this piece worthy of retaining and sharing…it was a failure on my part, to present it in quite the way I did.

Also…though I detest what feels like the endless expectation of qualifiers [IE: “not every…”], and I think common sense really aught to kick in, telling people “I never meant it that way”…I acknowledge that portions of this commentary may come off as if I don’t understand that pedophiles can be selfish, and do bad things in their own right.

I know that not all pedophiles are “lovey dovey”, or particularly good with children…or teens…

…It was the natural, pedophilic inclination, I was attempting to speak of…not every single individual pedophile on the planet.

It’s not known to be typical at all, for a pedophile to want to be violent with a child…though there are rare instances.

Last…What I was discussing here was how “normal” people serve as basis for the pedophile stereotype, versus the behaviors of actual pedophiles.

Children and teens universally get ignored, where it comes to the pedophile stereotype…Which, I figure, is why I did not get into discussing them here.

It’s strange coming back to a piece I wrote nearly a decade and a half ago [it’s 2021 now], and stumbling over recognizing my own original nuances…but this happens, sometimes.

I think my shortcoming, was in not clearly framing this piece…But, really…I think this is a good piece, and am almost motivated to delete the first portion of this new addendum you’re currently reading.

– Steve from 2021

This selection from “In Self Defense: The Life and Times of An Atheist BoyLover…Memoirs and Ethos”, has been narrated by Rocco White. Please enjoy the listen, or read along if you like…or need to.


Not Even Pedophilia…

A question to consider…Is it fair to say, that pedophiles are being judged, characterized and persecuted, for that which is not even pedophilic behavior?

Are we child lovers being falsely blamed for, and convicted on account of, the actions of people who are not even pedophiles in the first place?

Consider this…

It is a well known fact that, according to crime records, pedophiles make up a very small minority within that group which is convicted of sexual assault against minors.

Not only is it true, that pedophiles are nearly never responsible for the violent, unpleasant and injurious sexual assaults on minors, but it is also on public record that the overwhelming majority of those convicted of sexual assault on a minor are, in fact, heterosexual andriophiles (people who are sexually attracted to fully mature adults, as the primary, preference of their orientation).

According to, commonly misrepresented, records (in the U.S.) of sex crimes, actual pedophiles (people who are sexually attracted to prepubescent individuals, as the primary preference of their orientation) are rarely the initiator of sex crimes against minors.

In stead, the lions share of convictions on record, belongs to heterosexual men, who are andriophiles. These men tend to be looking for nothing more than a substitute partner, in the absence of another willing adult.

This is where one very common misunderstanding about pedophilia has come from (which has been misconstrued, and propagated into a stereotypical insult, thrown commonly at pedophiles). The error, is in believing that pedophiles have sex with children, because they cant “get a man or woman”…or, no other adult will have them…as though it is the result of inherent shortcomings in the pedophile, that he or she never has the opportunity to have sex with another adult, thus leading to him or her resorting to sex with children.

…but, getting back to the main point, the overwhelming bulk of child sex abuse cases, involve men who have vaginal intercourse with young girls. These men are not uncommonly the girls own father, step father, or a live in boyfriend of the girls mother. As the common story goes, either by way of bad fighting, or simply erosion of a relationship over time, the man and woman of the house stop having sex with each other…leaving one, or both, to eventually seek out sex with another partner…leaving the easy targets looking very appealing.

Many a man, has had sex with a young, small girl, when he was never even a pedophile to begin with…He would have far rather been having sex with a full grown woman, and realizes this even during the commission of the sexual assault (likely even fantasizing, that the girl is not a girl at all, but a full grown woman), but, for his own self serving purposes, the girl works successfully as a sexually gratifying stand in.

This points towards the true nature of andriophile child sexual encounters…which are characteristically mean, violent, entirely disregarding of the fact that the child is another human being…cold and uncaring…usurping and dominant…

…all of which have been, for a very long time, popularly believed to be the common elements of a pedophile child sexual relationship…

…but, there is something misleading about this…

It starts taking on the dark aura of political propaganda, when exposed to the light of fact…

…That fact being, that the overwhelming majority of all pedophile child sexual encounters known to take place, never even approach the level of “violent”. Further, to differentiate this type of sex, it is well understood and documented, that pedophiles enter into these relationships from an entirely different position of intent.

It is the hallmark of pedophilia, that nearly all pedophiles who have sex with children, enter into this activity, with the understanding that any child is a common, mutual (loved and cherished) companion, who’s own sexual gratification is just as important as the pedophiles…In fact, it is of paramount importance to a pedophile, that the child enjoy him or herself, and reach full sexual gratification, during any sexual activity.

Given the stark differences between both actual, physical activity, and the intent plus relationship factors, which both types of activity uniquely possess, it is neither rational nor ethical, to ever suggest that andriophile child sex and pedophile child sex are the same thing…or, even that they resemble one another.

The facts do not lie…and the facts tell us that these are two, almost entirely different, activities with practically no shared commonalities…and entire worlds of difference separating them into two distinct forms of action.

People who are not emotionally invested in children, tend to treat children like objects…and have a tendency to be abusive (even violently so) towards them.

That is where the brutal child rapes, the child murders, the psychological abuse, the violent abuse and the gross neglect of children comes from.

Pedophiles, on the other hand, only wish to share a mutually pleasing, relationship of sexual intimacy with a child…One which enhances both the child’s experience of life and their own.

Pedophilia has always been far, far deeper, than just a selfish pursuit of personal sexual satisfaction. By it’s nature, pedophilia strives to nurture a sexual relationship, which satisfies the needs and desires of all participants involved.

So…how is it, that pedophilia could ever be thought as equal, to your average, cruel, andriophile child rape?

The motives, intentions and real life outcomes, are clearly not even remotely the same…They are total opposites, in fact…One is loving and nurturing, while the other is brutal and violent.

It is painfully clear that, yes…pedophiles in this day and age, are almost never judged for who they, themselves, honestly are, and for what they, themselves, honestly do.

Instead, it is the horrible activities of sexual violation, propagated by andriophiles (often called “opportunistic pedophiles”…another cheap shot at pedophiles, and a manner of passing the buck…or, blame shifting), which are thrown at the feet of pedophiles…and by which pedophiles are maliciously judged and viciously condemned.

Today, pedophiles are stereotyped, judged and condemned, for things which are not even a part of pedophilia…Statistically speaking…pedophiles do not even do these things, with only rare, anomalous exceptions.

It is the opinion of this author, that defining these polar opposite activities as though they are “one and the same”, is not acceptable, is unethical, is fatally conflicted with honest and objective reality, and brings into question the integrity of all who continue to insist on refusal towards making practical distinctions, between these two very different things.